Living with anxiety is like living in hell. So many days have been held captive by my anxiety. I can be smiling but in my mind the wheels of anxiety will not, for the life of me, slow down. I feel like I'm dying, going to faint, have a seizure or aneurysm or that I just need to get out from wherever I am and run as far as possible so the pounding in my heart can stop. All my life I've been searching for calm waves in a turbulent storm. It's so hard when everyone tells you it'll be okay but anxiety puts all logic into a blender. I lived with this for so long and yet it all feels so foreign. I just want to breathe. I suppose we all have our cross(es) to bear. I wrote this for cathartic purposes but if it resonates with you, just know you are not alone. I hope we all get through it.
I'm sick of feeling shame over an illness I never ever wanted and never chose to have.